HUGE SETBACK:
BYU Football Fans Stunned as Kalani Sitake “Dies” in a Car Accident
In a shocking turn of events, Kalani Sitake, the revered BYU football coach, has “died” in a car accident involving a runaway parade float shaped like a giant football.
According to eyewitnesses, the float, which was part of a celebration for the team’s latest win, broke free from its restraints and careened onto the highway, colliding with Sitake’s car.
“But in a stunning twist, it was revealed that Sitake was actually kidnapped by aliens and replaced with a lifelike robot, which was the one that ‘died’ in the accident,” said a source close to the team.